Sorry for being away for so long. I guess you could say I have writer’s block. As much as I want to finish my story about Marie, it seems harder and harder to get it out of my head and into my blog. I had put a deadline on finishing it before her one year surg-iversary, but that didn’t happen. Maybe that is part of the writer’s block. Anyway, don’t give up hope, I do plan on finishing it…some day!
Unfortunately, I am not in the story telling mode right now. I’m in a more philosophic mode, so look out. 🙂
I just had an experience that I needed to share with you. I don’t remember if I told you that I had lost a friend a few months back. She had gastric by-pass surgery and after some complications, she passed away. This makes the second friend that I have lost after a gastric by-pass surgery and it makes me so sad and mad. My friend was only 51 years old and she was full of life.
Ever since my mom passed away, I have had this urge to comfort others that have had a personal loss. Especially a daughter that has lost a mother. I guess that is because I know the feeling and it helps me when I help them. I look at it as one of my missions in life. I guess you can say that by reaching out and telling a grieving daughter what I have done to get to this point in my grief, it gives me a sense of purpose and gets me one step closer to healing.
So when I heard my old co-worker had passed away, I reached out via Facebook, to her daughter. I sent her a private message to let her know how sorry I was to hear about her mother’s passing. I had not been in contact with her mother for some time, but I know that if I had seen her mom on the street, we would have started talking like it was yesterday. I had sent the daughter a message a day or two after her mom died. I went to my friend’s funeral and said my goodbyes and I continue to pray for my friend’s soul and her family.
My friend’s funeral was around the first of October, today, I got a message from my friend’s daughter thanking me for my message. I had replied back, giving her words of comfort and support and she replied back and sent me a FB friend request. Why am I telling you all of this? Because after I accepted her friend request, we started talking on-line. I just got off the computer with her, after talking to her for a good 2 1/2 to 3 hours. If that isn’t the purpose of life, I don’t know what is.
I told her the things that I have done to help heal my own pain for my mother’s loss. I told her the way things use to be after I first lost my mom. How my heart hurt and how that empty space in my heart couldn’t be filled. She said it sounded very familiar. Then I told her that it will get better. I gave her hope and hopefully some peace of mind that things will get better. She said it was good to know that there was a light at the end of the tunnel, because it was hard for her to see it right now. I told her that there was definitely a light at the end of the tunnel, because her mom was holding it up for her. 🙂 It was a good feeling to be able to help, reminisce and encourage my friend’s daughter. I believe that my friend is smiling down on me right now, very pleased with my actions. And I believe that God and MY mom is right beside her, beaming with pride for the person that I have become.
So what is the purpose of my rambling? What is the purpose of life? In my mind, the purpose of life is to take the experiences in your life (good and bad) and make a difference in another person’s life. That other person could be a friend, a family member or a stranger. There is no telling who it might be, only God knows. All you can do is be prepared to reach out to those that are in need. A simple message of condolences to a friend’s daughter has turned into a vehicle to help another human being through a rough time in their life. In the end, I didn’t only help my friend’s daughter, I helped myself. I am healing my loss of my friend, by helping her daughter.
Isn’t that what we were put on this earth to do? In my mind, it is. I don’t want to be on this earth, running the rat race, and feel like all of my time has been wasted. I want to live this life that I have been given, by reaching out to people in need and helping them through the tough times. I want to leave this earth knowing that I have helped others the way that my mom has helped others. My mom never knew a stranger. I have definitely become my mother’s daughter and I am very proud of that. Because every time I help others, I am passing on my mother’s legacy. That’s what God wants us to do, to spread his love to others.
So the next time you lose a friend, reach out to their family. You never know what a few kind words could lead to. It might just lead to a new friend request on Facebook…that equates to another step of healing for yourself. God bless you all and Rest In Peace my old friend, your daughter is going to be alright. I plan on keeping an eye on her for you. 😉